What can I say, that has not already been said? In print, the circuit, TV, the web, or word of mouth. I am known as your HIV + Supermodel and your "Circuit Legend"for the 90's.

But, times change and we all get older. So now I hand you the torch to carry on. Be it the new face, performer, or HIV/AIDS activist.

I am known as a Plastic, Erotic, Tragic, Logic, Handsome, Exotic. You choose.

As we approach the year 2000, things have changed in my life.

We all have to evolve into something more constantly challenging ourselves and each other to be the best we can be.

Living now with HIV for over 16 years, I now take the path of GOD, FAMILY, FRIENDS, HEALTH, and FINALLY "WORK" in that order.

You live and learn as you come out. In my case at 15, I have lived the life of a gay man 3 TIMES OVER. From drugs, infidelity, game playing, etc., as I have lived in all the major cities.

Note: I love all of my memories good and bad, plus the TRUE FRIENDS I have made on my journey to all of these cities that have offered me in my life. Not to mention if it was not for these times there would be no THOM COLLINS. So this is not a judgment to be taken literally, just an observation.

From New York, where I was born and visit as much as I can it is "too fast." To Texas which is "too friendly" ( a good thing) Then on to Los Angeles which is "too FAKE" ( enough said) To South Beach, Fla which to me is "too Flawless."( a gay paradise)

I love Latin men. The sexual energy they put off is so strong. So next to "SIZE" that would be my fantasy. So I still have a "bit" of superficiality in me. I choose to look at it as "my fetish."

I love romance and the "gay lifestyle" but coming from someone who has experienced the "Mecca" of gay life, I can say I have done it, enjoyed it, swallowed it, taken it, rimmed it, licked it, jerked it, exposed to it, living with it, snorted it, overdosed it, played it, rented it, bought it, sold it, rented it, praised GOD FOR IT, but most of all HAD IT!

I AM the most in your face gay man I think you could ever meet. Not to mention the most honest. I am not going to sit here and preach to any of you about your lives.

Just some advice from someone who really cares about the true meaning of "GAY PRIDE":

Take responsibility and pride in "who you are" NOT "who you are doing." Brothers when it is all said and done, and you are going to get that towel from the bathroom to wipe off yourself from the trick you have in the other room, who do you "really love?"

Is it the person next to you, is it the one you left behind, the one who passed, or the one you just broke up with.

It should be the MAN IN THE MIRROR!

Love YOURSELVES, do have fun and enjoy your life as a PROUD GAY MAN. However, loving yourselves should not just be emphasized on your outer appearance or how others perceive your "BODY."

Take pride in how you look, but put just as much pride into your PERSONALITY as you do in the gym. Your pecs and ass will someday not be the way you remember them to be. Your heart and soul is the one that should be worked out daily, for it is the one that shines the most when your outer beauty is GONE.

For those of you that don't go to the gym, you are way ahead of us "MEATHEADS." I say that tongue in cheek. Not all "bodyboys " are EGOMANIACS, it is just that I have met the most interesting, loving, sweet, sexiest people in my life who have never heard of a PEC DECK!

We as a community need to work on our inner beauty and intelligence, to give our future younger gay brothers something to reach for in ways of leading us into the future. What can we teach them if we just conquer them as they come out? We need to nurture them and give them the guidance of the dangers of unsafe sex, drugs, and the "body image" that is shoved in their face coming out as being the key to fitting in.

We need to love them as we expect to be loved.

I wish I had someone to lead me way back then, instead of showing me that gay life is all about the "look," " the parties," "who you know," and the worst the damn drugs. It took a suicide attempt to "GET A GRIP." I pray you never reach this very lonely space. You know what I am talking about.

I have always said my heart and soul is far more attractive than my outer appearance. I pray you will find your inner peace, spirituality, and love for yourself. For you can't love someone if you don't love yourself. Thankyou RU-Paul!

Don't just play a character, DEMONSTRATE CHARACTER!

Quote: "I would rather have 30 minutes of something wonderful, than a lifetime of nothing special."

Look into relationships and not just sexual exercise.

As for my 16 HIV plus survival, I only have to address this. If GOD FORBID you have just tested positive and you think your life is over, then I have lived the last 16 years in vain.

No one negative or positive is promised tomorrow. Live your life to the fullest. Live each day as if it were your last keeping some form of spirituality close to your heart and guiding light if you ever get caught up in the darkness. Don't just look to the clubs, excitement, and the beating of the tom tom's throughout the night to find inner peace. Look above.

God loves you, Impress him, not MAN!

When you look in the mirror, do you like what you see?

Depression, anxiety, drugs, alcohol, sex addiction and HIV related stress are the first problems...

The next problem is finding a treatment center where you can safely be yourself an dtalk about the things you need to.

Fortunately, Pride Institute, the leader in providing mental health and addictions treatment for the gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgendered communities, has programs offering residential, outpatient and helfway house services.

The Pride Institute
1-800-54-PRIDE